Jakarta, ThedailyID — When a child cries, many parents try to validate their feelings and reassure them. However, some people worry that too much validation could make children spoiled.
So, can validating a child’s emotions really make them spoiled?
The answer is no. Emotional validation can instead support a child’s emotional development.
Emotional validation means acknowledging and understanding what a child is feeling. For example, when a child feels disappointed because they cannot get what they want, parents can recognize that disappointment without immediately blaming or ignoring it.
This approach also matters as children enter school age. From a psychological perspective, children need emotional security rather than constant pressure to perform or achieve.
However, validating emotions does not mean allowing every behavior. Parents can still set boundaries when a child behaves inappropriately.
For example, a parent could say, “I know you’re angry because you can’t play right now. You can be angry, but you cannot hit.”
This teaches children that every emotion is acceptable to feel, but not every behavior is acceptable.
Examples of Emotional Validation
Parents may sometimes struggle to find the right words when their children are upset. These are some examples that can help:
- “I can see that you’re feeling sad.”
- “It’s understandable that you feel that way.”
- “I’m here to help you through this.”
- “You’re disappointed because things didn’t go the way you wanted, right?”
- “It’s okay to feel sad. When you’re ready, you can tell me about it.”
These statements help children feel heard without requiring parents to give in to every request.
Benefits of Emotional Validation
Children who feel emotionally heard can develop important emotional skills. Some potential benefits include:
- Better emotional regulation: Children learn to recognize and understand what they feel.
- Greater confidence: They learn that difficult emotions are a normal part of their experiences.
- Healthier relationships: They become more comfortable communicating their feelings and understanding other people’s emotions.
Therefore, emotional validation does not mean spoiling a child. Parents can acknowledge their child’s feelings while still maintaining rules and boundaries.
